Where I Belong.

I am not really sure how to even begin writing today as my heart still feels like it is in my feet.

Last night, we all found out that Heaven gained a serious warrior last night, Spencer Hampton, as he lost his battle with cancer.

As I tossed and turned last night, I just prayed and prayed for a flood of peace to wash over Lindsay, Spencer’s wife, the Hampton and Styons’ family and all those who ever had the incredible privilege to spend a moment with Spencer. 

Music usually helps in some way or another so I turned on my ipod and put the song, “Where I Belong” by Building 429 on repeat.

The words say this: 

All I know is I’m not home yet.

This is not where I belong.

Take this world.

And give me Jesus.

This is not where I belong. 

 When the Earth shakes,

I wanna be found in You.

When the lights fade,

I wanna be found in You.

All I know is I’m not home yet.

This is not where I belong.

Take this world

And give me Jesus.

This is not where I belong.

The phrase, “All I know is I’m not home yet” rang over and over again in my head.

Spencer is home.

We were blessed to be able to borrow him and make memories with him for a while but He belongs in the arms of Jesus and it was time for him to go home.

While Spencer may have physically lost his health on this earth, his soul was flying. He was witnessing to people by simply opening his eyes in the morning as he faced each day with the strength and courage I know so many of us long to possess.

Spencer is home.

His body is repaired, whole and perfect.  He is probably organizing a game of football up there in the Heavens.  His mind is alert, steadfast and renewed.  His heart is fulfilled, complete and perfect.

 I know he is watching over us all, especially Lindsay, as we decide how we are going to handle the grief and the pain.  I have a good feeling that he wouldn’t want anything other than for us all to run to the arms of Jesus, because that is where He is too.

 Spencer is home.

Spencer taught us how to fight and fight hard. Throwing in the towel was simply not an option in any area of his life.

Spencer was a true example of living passionately and loving passionately.  He gave his all in each moment he was presented with and when his personal strength ended, God’s tapped in.

Spencer was a tangible reminder to us all that life here is short but it does not require a lot of time to make an incredible impact. 

I believe that although Spencer’s body was weak, he was the one carrying people to the feet of Jesus and saying, “Don’t worry about me, Jesus knows exactly what He is doing.”

Spencer is home.

Oh sweet Father, help us see life as Spencer saw it and as he sees it today sitting in your lap.  Lord, let us cling to you more tightly than ever as our hearts weep and break while dealing with this loss. 

I pray against what Satan would love for us to do, to shake our heads in frustration and ball up our fists in bitterness. I pray that we seek You immediately and intimately, that you reign us all in and remind us that Your love supersedes any human emotion we may be feeling right now. 

I thank You Jesus that you thought so highly of us to let us be a part of Spencer’s life and I pray that as we continue in our days forward, we yearn to live with the passion and strength he so fervently showed. 

Jesus, thank You that this is not goodbye and that our time with Spencer here was a mere introduction for we are promised eternal LIFE with you in your Kingdom.  Thank you that you allow us to call that home. 

Jesus, I pray we do not seek for understanding in mysteries that our beyond our comprehension but rather we seek for Your peace, which you freely offer to any heart that needs it. 

Jesus, thank you for Your sovereignty and sweetly taking Spencer up there safely where he feels free, whole and complete.  Thank you that you love us like you do and that we never face a battle without you father.

I pray for Lindsay and the Styons’ and Hampton family, that your floodgates of peace burst open and fill every area of their lives.  I pray for Your joy to fill their hearts and that their mourning turns into dancing.  Jesus, show them how much you love them and remind them that this is not goodbye because we all have the privilege of going home.

            In Jesus powerful name I pray, Amen.

Also, I started thinking and I am sure Spencer never loses a round of poker in Heaven 🙂

Against All Odds. 


One thought on “Where I Belong.

  1. Cleere..wow! You have a definite gift with words. This is so beautiful! And so true!!! Thank you for this. I am going to share it via facebook (hope that is okay..if not please let me know) because I think others need to see it. Love you!

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